I am a lover.I have learned the beauty of love and I thrive in it. I live on it and I would not have it another way. Over the course of my life I have lain with many women and I have wooed a many more into my life. But, in my time so far I have only truly loved a few.
I loved a Demon once. We were both demons and we thrived on the power that came from fear an misunderstanding by the public at large. We studied and scrutinized humans and their self deceitful practices and beliefs. We soared together through dismal skies raining down hell and fire on the masses. We roamed their hideaway's and their holes and we rooted out the sheep and devoured them. We seduced the weak and showed them the depths of their depravity. We destroyed cults and brought low empires. And, we fought. We had earth shaking battles that could go on for months. Villages and friendships burned in our wake. We created a residual psychic wave that still echoes today.
Years later I stumbled upon and Nature Spirit. She was fascinating on first glance and so much more so once I got to know her. She was smart and she had passion to spare. She saw the world not as a thing to be conquered, nor a thing to embrace. She saw the world as a thing to use towards ones greater understanding of all things. She knew that beauty had a place and that the ignorant didn't need to be punished for their weakness but instead guided subtlety towards a better end. It was like she sprouted from the earth and walked among us as a beacon for a happier life. We brought Life and Love into this world. And we fought. We had cosmos rending battles that could last for years. We altered whole segments of peoples lives when they chose sides. We clashed so that the smallest phrase could cause hurricane force destruction on the other end. Athena, Aphrodite and Dionysus love us still.
Years later I met a Sorceress. I was at a gathering thrown by a ... strange sort of human. When she walked into the room I knew something was different about her but it wasn't until later that I found out what it is. She had an innate ability to make something out of nothing. Her passion knew no bottom in it's depths and she had no limitations on what was possible. She snagged me and pulled me from the mouth of lions. Together we walked the earth proving that anything is possible. We survived together, my magic bolstering hers and her magic strengthening mine. We became friends and lovers and we generally avoided destroying anything if we could help it; all while dreaming of destroying it all one day. And we fought, but only at the end. When she realized that I could not be harnessed or tamed she grew quite irate and a battle ensued, a small one that has since caused no further harm. Our friendship carries on to this day.
Years later I met a genuine goddess. I had no idea at the time what she was. But I soon learned well the ways of the gods. She is different. There is a sense of traveling almost without effort through the world and life, but also there is a profound depths to the hows and whys and a keen sense of direction. This is not about a path set on showing the world a better way, instead it's a path of being true to the way you walk and letting others walk the hell on around if they don't like it. It's not a path of leading others to a more natural look at those things around us, it's a path of experiencing the beauty of it all and just letting it be as it is. And it's not just a path of survival and indifference, it's a path of embracing the whole and absorbing the truth no matter how bad it might hurt. I am going to Marry her.
I cannot love any one of these women any less than I did on the day I fell for them. They are all still amazing and beautiful people. I am blessed to have lived my best loves in the midst of Chaos. There are others that hold special places in my heart. There's a Fairy, she broke my heart so bad once I thought I'd never recover. There's a Witch who married another man but who I have a soul bond with that is so deep she is like a guiding angel. And I have an succubus. She is in trouble at the moment for her impulse control issues but we are working on that.
Love is chaos. Love is passion and heartache. Love is desire and fear. Love is dominance and submission played out on an ever shifting stage with ever shifting players. Love is hard and it's also so very easy. Love is Chaos.
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